Totally missing my sister today...
I'd thought I'd post what I read at her funeral service just over a month ago. It's the realest thing I've ever written.
"I wanted
to sit and just observe but Michel would've thought that was odd. So here I
am...
God
blessed me with an amazing big sister. Ever since I can remember, I'd admired
her; the way she walked, how she talked, how people were so attracted to her. I
studied her as a child. Whatever charm she possessed, that inner happiness that
she carried that made people want to be around her and to do things for her, I
knew I'd be able to pick it up and make it my own. And I have, but I never
forgot where it came from, and like her, I'd never take advantage. She was
graceful and polite. People recognized her light and it made them happy to feed
that- strangers, family, friends, the staff at the Dunkin Donuts and Bojangles.
People know good when they see it...
If I could
compare us to colors, my sister was a fire red, very hot and spicy. I started
out baby pink, soft and sheltered, but as I spent time with her, and inherited
some of her style, mannerisms, established a better connection with her, she
added her red to my pink, and made me fuchsia- my favorite color of the
rainbow. She was a teacher, a mentor, an enhancer...
I can't
say enough about how wonderful Michel was, or how much we shared. If I tried,
we'd be here forever. But I can say she was my cheer leader, my protector, my
supporter, one of my best friends. She made any story funny, she made shopping
and eating a sensual experience, and her zest for life and adventure pulled me
out of my cave of artistic isolation and reminded me to live outside of my head.
I'm
blessed to have had a second mother as a child, and a fun-loving, girl-talking,
advice-giving best girlfriend that I called sister as an adult.
Michel
and I grew up differently but our lives were so in sync it was uncanny. Our
personalities are similar in moments when I least expect it- ranging from
moments of giving out necessary verbal thrashings to just sitting in the sun
and absorbing chi energy. She was human, but most of all she was love. She will
forever be my sister."
~Sammi
