Three Years to 30 exists because I literally have less than three years until I'm 30 years old. If I find the right person by that age, I do want to settle down. What young, talented, successful, single lady doesn't? However, now is NOT the time. I'm not published, I'm making decent money-I'd like to make more, I want these student loans gone...etc., etc., etc.
One of my bffs hates when I do that- run down my list of why I'm not ready and then she'll give an example of an old flame and say, "Huh, you lie, Black Gurl! Cuz if dude had asked, you would've been on it!" Hee Hee! She's right, but he didn't...and thennnnnnn I realized it was for the best.
At this point, I haven't explored enough, that includes travel, education, learning men and what I can live with and can't live with, and I haven't achieved enough of my personal goals- spiritually, emotionally, yes, psychologically (can't negate your mental health. Doesn't matter who you are.), or financially.
I still kick myself in the behind for paying more attention to boys than studying for my SATs and getting the BEST grades in high school, which made me ineligible for a full scholarship and left me with crazy student loans- mail and harassing phone calls. These days I have the loan people in my good graces since I pay them and consistently. But I emphasize, I want the loans gone or close to gone before I consider combining finances, credit scores, and mortgage payments with an M.A.N. If I want him to have his stuff together, I have to have mine together too. I can be hypocritical at times, but not in this case.
Anywho my thing is I don't want to settle and resent my partner because I, yes I, put my dreams aside for us. Sacrifice is all well and good, but I don't have to do that now. Glad about it.
What I can do now is continue to make my goals priority and make sure dating stays in its rightful place, located just below Jesus and Sammi's Personal Success.
With that said, this blog serves as a platform to express my feelings, share information, and provide commentary on my life pre-30. The adventures up to 27 have been amazing, fun, triumphant, sad, difficult, and more, but I'm alive, thriving, and I plan to make the most of my 20s. I'll deal with the 30s when I get there. Hopefully I'll have no regrets going in b/c I rode these next three years til the wheels fell off, rolled down the street, and out of my sight...
Love,
Sam
So I don't usually do the blogging thing, but...*sigh* My SammY, why does it have to be "this" or "that"? Why can't it be both?!? I absolutely believe in setting goals, but I've also realized (trying to at least...it's an everyday struggle) that "the quickest way to make God laugh is to tell him your plans." I also believe God won't bring you something until He feels as though you're ready for it, so after those 3 bestselling novels, then the novel turned play, play turned movie, and TV spinoff of the movie...maybe then. Oooorrr, you could have your man hold your purse while you conquer all of that greatness! (maybe not hold your purse, but you get the picture!) BOTH...not this then that! (In my opinion. That is what a blog is right? You know I'm new to this!)
ReplyDeleteand you know... i hope you meet a man that says.
ReplyDelete"sam...thats your dream, huh...to get to the moon...for real...well damn babe...let's start sketching spaceships..."
and that's who i'm eyesclosedfingerscrossing for all my friends.